Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Recalling...

These few days have been rather harsh on me, given the tight schedules and my poor sense of time management.
As usual, revision's not starting yet as of any time soon even though exams' in something like 4~5 weeks time.

Sometimes, I lost sight of the very purpose that lies within for every action, for every decision.
I forgot what was the motivation behind my whole 12 years of schooling.
Well at least I'm pretty sure I forgot the 1st 10, but the last 2 yrs in JC?
What's all that motivation and drive coming from? Desires, Status, or Recognition?
I'm pretty sure it's a rather fair mix of all + something else.

And even now, I still can't identify for the common cause that drives me on for ACCA.
The title, the prestige, or the god-damn Porsche that seems so damn possible?

Similarly, for what purpose that drives me to go work instead of studying?
The money, the experience, or just the mere realisation that I am able to stay comfortable in this job?
Of cos, I did not sell my soul for money, but neither did I exchanged all my energy for it.

Life's been rather draining of me for the past 1/2 a year, and I'm pretty sure nothing's gonna change.
Or at least, till any radical changes take place.
Which of cos, I foresee won't even with my admission into such a radical institution.

Afterall, irradical and rational systematic reasoning logics is the very basis of me.

With all these, does life gets any worser however?
I won't certainly say so, though for the moment it's definitely stagnant.
Life's bad, but be it for better or worse, one still has to wear the pants and bring the bacon home, just like how everyone needs to eat and sleep daily.
And I know I certainly needed the sleep badly.

As much as I needed other things...

1 MoOeD~!!

At 2:03 pm, April 28, 2006, Blogger CoW g0eS Mo0 m0o~! said...

same lah same lah!
GO AND DIE lah u...
why still haven't die?
KNS dunno which idiot keep casting animate dead... NBz~

And no saliva lah...
later drool on u then u know...

 

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